I am thrilled to have found this site! I started riding when I was 6 and it was what made me "me." It was the one and only thing in life that set me free and which I had no anxiety over. Careers and children took me away for awhile altho I was always in and out, taking lessons, trail riding between a divorce and basically surviving life as a single parent to a child with learning disabilities. Ultimately I ended up leaving the corporate world to work in a barn, which led to a managing a large eventing barn having a barn sitting business, then owning my own place and having 3 of my own. A dream come true. However, 2 years ago I had a bad accident on my soulmate of a horse,fracturing my spine in 5 places. He has physical issues that limit his riding and I was working on getting him ready for bareback. This horse was a neglect/abuse case, and during the first year he had numerous meltdowns that I worked him through, ultimately finding Natural Horsemanship techniques, much different from the H/J world I 'grew up" in, but which helped him transition back to accepting a rider. In the meantime I expanded my own knowledge and gained certification in trimming and massage. He is the love of my life, and has become a very happy, well trained horse. On the ground, he is a perfect gentleman and could pass all the Parelli ground tests. Under saddle, he's come milestones, but still has his moments. So, here I am in my dream home with tons of trails and riding, yet the fear comes back when he starts acting up in the slightest way. I also have an Arab that has been "off" from riding duties for almost a year, and I need to get back to work. All of this I did, no fear, no anxiety 3 years ago, and came so far with my first boy. Now, I psyche myself out and get scared. It is driving me crazy! We went for a ride around the property the other day, and suddenly he refuses to go forward past one of our open gates. The head starts flipping, he starts to pivot around, backing, and I have to fight the panic. I have had 2 years of physical things one after another, so I, too am just getting back into shape. I didn't have the strength or confidence to push him forward, so I turned him and had him do as much of a circle as I could elsewhere, rode him back, having to slow him down the whole way, then had him do some circles in different spots. But he firmly refused to head back away from the barn. This was the second time I rode him around alone, the first time he would've gone anywhere. So frustrating! I am so looking forward to hearing from and about others on this board. I am desperate to get my confidence and skill level back, and I look forward to finding support and info here!
Welcome jp. I'm totally new to PR as well, returning to horses after ions. I too searched for a new way of training other than the old traditions, and decided Clinton Anderson was for me. You have every reason to be cautious after your accident, and I'm sure you'll get lots of support here.
If you're not feeling up to dealing with this under saddle, why don't you deal with the gate issue through groundwork? Put your NH halter on and "send" him back and forth in front of that gate. When he's moved his feet enough, walk him way beyond it for a rest. Then go back and do it again, until it's a non-issue with him. Move his feet - keep his mind on you. This usually works when they are being nappy about something. Good luck, and keep us posted. ---------- Fresh Start
Hi jp, Welcome to the site, you will get tons of help, support and advice here. I'm afraid I personally can't offer much advice - I'm usually the one on here asking others for it!!:0) I also rode as a child and came back to it as an adult and bought my first horse an ex-raceing TB last year at the age of 42. I've had 3 falls this year (thankfully none of them serious, the worst being a cracked rib) but as a result my confidence has yo-yo'd and currently is quite low but starting to pick up a lttle bit.(again!!) People on here have been brilliant and I really think that I might well have given up by now if it wasn't for some of the friends I feel I've made on here. Anyway I'll stop waffling and look forward to reading more of your posts. Megan
Hi, this post is going to be no help to you at all, but I just wanted to say its kind of reassuring to me (as fairly new to owning my own horse)to hear that people with years of experience can loose their confidence/belief in how they are handling issues with their horses.
As I said, no help to you but it makes me feel less daft about feeling nervous! :)
I also agree with Freshstart's post on handling this problem.
I am so happy to have found a place where everyone understands the fear factor and doesn't just tell you to get on and ride! As for the suggestion of working him on the ground, it is a great one. I have actually done so much work on the ground with him collectively that he will go anywhere and move from any pressure on the ground with me. That's what makes his antics under saddle so frustrating. Today he went through a kiddie pool I set up. I hosed him down for the first time this year (hoses were always THE most scariest thing to him). We have walked the whole property and he hasn't given me one problem. He didn't give me any problem the 3 other times I rode him all over. This particular day, however, would NOT go by the gate. So I start justifying it: The sun was where it just caught our eye and was blinding in the spot he refuse; it was a bit windy that dayp; he was having an off day; he hadn't been ridden without someone walking on the ground with us for 2 weeks (which the only time out of the four times I've ridden him) you know, anything to "excuse" his behavior. The best thing probably would have been to jump off and work him on the ground and gotten back on, but truthfully, I'm not sure I could've "hopped" back up there with no mounting block. In the past 2 years I've had 2 surgeries (hysterectomy related)the spinal injury, finding and placing my Dad who was diagnosed with Alzheimer's in a nursing home, my Dad passing away, my 17 y/o stepdaughter having a baby then losing her 45 y/o mom, and my Dad passing away. What that means basically is the past 2 years my riding has been way sporatic, and I've got some weight to lose and muscles to find before hopping back up without a mounting block can happen. That's part of my "issue" as well. I've had so many darn obstacles, physical and emotional, that sometimes it seems like too much work to put the work in that I need to in order to get to where it's NOT so much work. Wow, I can ramble, can't I!
I'm not a trainer, but I know the principle of making the right thing easy and the wrong thing hard is a good one. It sounds like you tried, by circling him, but then he might have been ultimately rewarded by getting to go home. I wonder if you would have gotten off at the gate and done Parelli exercises on the ground - especially the circling and driving games, and then tried leading him through the gate if it would have helped.
I think eventually, he would have given up and gone through. even doing it from the ground is a victory. I know it is important not to lose a contest with them, and they can certainly hold out for a looooonnnnngggggg time! (I have mules, so I know what the testing of endurance can look like!) There have been many times when I thought I would not be ablt ot physically outlast the beast and have come close to giving up. And then, low and behold, the next minute is the one they give mentally! Dixie was giving me a real time in the round pen one day. Instead of her usual compliant self, she was determined to outlast me. Her lips almost looked clenched and her head was high! I kept her going, reversing, changing gaits for maybe half an hour before she started with just a little licking. I thought I would die! (She was hardly winded and barely breaking a sweat.) But just as I thought I would have to quit, (and let her feel like she was the boss), she lowered her head and started asking to come in to me. Whew! Such times have taught me that you just have to hang in there - don't get frustrated - just hang in there until you get the "give." After that it is all down hill. If I have one suggestion, it would be to take your horse to the same spot on foot and try to get through the gate. Plan to spend half the day. Take lots of water and a snack. But don't come home until he has learned the lesson. Once he goes through, do it 10 more times until it is so boring he couldn't care less. Then you might try walking part way back to the barn, turning around and getting through the gate again. Circle and do your exercises at any point he refuses. Once he'll go through from any point, try it from the saddle. (maybe the next day!) But plan on taking the time and make a day of it if you have to, The main thing is to come away as the leader, with him understanding that very clearly. \Hang in there. You've come a long way, baby!
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Dixie Mom
"The art of riding: Keeping a horse between you and the ground!"
PS There is another technique that John Lyons calls the "go forward cue." You are on the ground and you tap the point of the hip with a carrot stick (or buggy whip or whatever long thing you have.) You just tap, tap, tap, tap, tap until the horse takes one step forward. Then you stop an reward with pets and release from the tapping. You can add a verbal cue, as well, with whatever sound you usually make to tell your horse to go forward, like kissing or clucking. Anyway, the horse gets tired eventually of the irritation and learns to step forward. (With mules, the point to tap is right over the top of the hips). With our young mule who refused to load or cross water, this is the technique we used. He always had to face the obstacle - never got to circle or turn to the side. Just tap, tap, tap until a step forward. Then LOTS of love. One step into the trailer or a foot in the water, then reward and back out. then tap into the trailer again, reward and back out. It took a professional trainer (Steve Edwards) 45 minutes at a clinic to get him into a trailer, but once in, Buddy was standing quietly and happily, like it was the best place in the world to be. And actually, it was! Because outside the trailer was a lot of tapping! Once we got home, my son had to reinforce the lesson. It took an hour, but he didn't give up. My son did this for 3 days in a row and each day got better and shorter. Buddy hops into the trailer like a rabbit now. It's not a difficult technique, but like any other, you have to be willing to stick it out until you get a result you want. You might practice this at home on familiar turf to teach the cue, and then use it on the trail as needed. ----------
Dixie Mom
"The art of riding: Keeping a horse between you and the ground!"
