I now get on my horse with more confidence that I have in a very long time. I am not worried about telling my "horsey" friends that I am have problems and I am not ready to go trail riding with anybody right now. What a burden off my back, no more trying to put on this brave front and ending with lame excuses for getting off my horse during a ride.

I am more determined then ever to get back to the sport that I love. I am 51 years old and I have had many challenges in my life and I have met them head on and this one is now no different. When I was 45 I completely changed careers, I was a branch manager in a commercial bank, well I had enough of that and went and became an EMT (Emergency Medical Tech), well from there I have become a Paramedic in New York State, that was a year of pure hell, I was the oldest person in my class, they called me mom,(lovingly) but as with that I was determined to get through it and I did. I look at this challenge as I looked at that challenge. I will get through it. I have already started to notice the change in my horse and myself, when we get into the ring to work, we are working, his attention is on me, he is looking more and more to me for guidence and I find that I am giving him that. I am finding that he is forgiving me of my mistakes and I am forgiving him of his (which are probably mine anyway.)

Thank goodness my trainer is kind and understands my fears and is stern when needed and kind when called for. She (my trainer) gives me a reality check she dosen't sugar coat what she wants but works with me to over come the problems. Just as an example, we were working in an arena that my horse was not familar with and my husband had brought his horse with us to ride on new trails and when my horse caught sight of his horse while I was working in the arena, he got all out of sorts, which totally unnerved me. Thank goodness that my trainer was the sane one there, she saw my face, and as I looked at her she talked me through the whole incident, not with berating words but with stern and understanding knowledge. I look forward to working with Callie (my horse) in the ring instead of dreading going to the barn. I find that even though it has been very chilly here and I really really really hate the cold weather, when I get into that ring and start working I forget about the cold and by the end we are both sweating from the work out, good for both of us.

My goal for next summer is to go out on trail rides with my husband and friends and not be afraid that I will come back battered and bruised.

Anyway, just wanted to put my thoughts out there and to thank all of you for your words, thoughts, ideas, and most of all your understanding.

Have happy days and great rides.
Jackie

Last Edited on 29-Oct-2008 8:29 AM

Dixie Mom

"The art of riding:
Keeping a horse between you and the ground!"

What amazes me is how much it dents my self esteem having apprehension. It makes me feel like less than... like I have lost my touch.It blows me away how compassionate people are on here. It gave me the confidence to confide in a few older trainers who have been helpful too. I felt alone prior, like it was a big no-no to talk about apprehension.

Since this is my only job skill,I don't feel like I have the luxury of slowing down and I feel pressure to always have a confident exterior. I give owners huge credit for having the confidence to seek help... they have been my role models through this.

Last Edited on 29-Oct-2008 10:59 AM

Jackie, I sure wish I could speak with your trainer.It is quite an accomplishment to comeback from such an accident. It is great that you have a teacher who gets where you are coming from. I always seek out trainers who are twenty-thirty years my senior for advice. Those are the folks who work smarter not harder. I hope to be at this for as many years.